The Procession to Calvary is out now on Steam, and if you’re a person of culture who appreciates high art, refined music, and fart jokes – you should play it.
Imagine if one of those Monty Python cut-up animations was a video game, and you pretty much get what this game is like.
The Procession to Calvary is a point-and-click adventure game made from Renaissance-era paintings and public domain recordings of classical music. Just like the previous game by Joe Richardson, Four Last Things.
It’s silly, pretty, and after playing it from start to finish I can also say – a lot of wacky fun.
The game tells the story of a brave warrior who’s particularly fond of murder. After the holy war is over, there’s a lot less murdering to be done, so she decides to travel south after the tyrant Heavenly Peter – the one who started the war. Surely the people would be happy if she murdered him, right?
Throughout your journey, you have the option to either stick to your murdering ways (by “using” your sword on everyone you meet) or actually try and solve the puzzles in your way. The game doesn’t warn you that “your actions might come back to haunt you…” so you might want to use your wits instead of your blade. On the other hand – you have a sword, so nothing short of a small army can stand in your way.